The past reached out this morning and caught me by surprise… Said “hello, how are you?”… brought a smile to my eyes… At one time, we walked hand in hand and he had held my heart but our time together ended, our life paths moved apart.
I got an e-mail this morning from an ex… surprisingly, it was nice to hear from him. What was even nicer was the fact that I could call my mate and tell him all about it with complete confidence that he wouldn’t get upset…. he knows that not only do I love him but I am “in love” with him… I find it interesting because just this past weekend I realized that I have not a shred of doubt or jealousy concerning our marriage. It is a new feeling for me because I have always battled these feelings in past relationships. This all came about at an event we were attending at our local Harley dealership. As is normal for HD events the bikini babes were out in force, washing the bikes, competing for tips and vying for first place in the requisite contest. High heels and fabric scraps draped on beautiful, thin, young bodies…. and me, a windblown and disheveled, far from thin, granny. Guess what? I wouldn’t trade places with them for anything because strange as it may seem they don’t have anything I want… It is a wonderful place to be… for my self and my marriage… I can look back down my life path and see how the twists, turns and rough spots have brought me to where I am today. I am a strong, healthy, attractive woman who can work side by side with my mate and still be feminine… I relish this newly discovered freedom… another gift of time… this confidence in who I am coupled with the fact that I am truly loved has allowed me to be more alive than ever before. I know that the path before me is going to be shorter than what I’ve already walked…. I know that it will still have twists, turns and rough spots yet unseen… But I also know that I will traverse them with more skill and grace because of what I have already gone through. So let the past reach out from time to time… I am now at a place where it no longer bothers me… I can say “hello” to it all and by choice, see only the good… most all the ugly parts filtered out by the distance… life is good and I enjoy walking with my mate since our two roads converged in an autumn wood…